Where should I go out tonight?
As a woman in her late 20âsâŚ33, Iâm sleepy, sure. But as a former Jersey Girl, the need to go out is deep within me (next to the belly button ring). While I have the energy, how dare I stay home on a Saturday night binging Greyâs Anatomy when I live in the city that never sleeps!? Especially when Iâm single and, like everyone else, tired of swiping on the apps. Time is running out to meet my future first husband and father of my children⌠praying heâs at the bar.
What is Night Out?
NIGHT OUT is a weekly newsletter that will answer the question âwhere should I go out tonight?!â as I search for The Perfect Nightâ˘, ranking every bar, club, and backroomâs:
Aesthetic
Wait Time
Husband Material
Yummy-ness
Shaking Ass Factor
Special Girls Room Report
Final Bar Tab
Was My Hangover Worth It?
Iâm just a regular girl - Iâm not on the list (hello! I'd love to be on the list) - going to the must-go places. How many tries for me to get into The Box? Iâm accepting bets. And Iâll bring special guests, comedians and NYC darlings, out with me and give you a peek into our night.
Subscribe for all of the juicy details.
Paid subscribers get a play by play of my night with all of the juicy details and my full honest review of whether it was worth it or if I should have stayed in and put on my retinol. Bonus, youâll be helping to buy a round and get me home safe because all contributions are going straight to my drinks and uber fund.
Will I meet my husband? Get into the DJ booth? Remember to brush my teeth!? My therapist thinks this is a bad idea for my mental health and only time will tell.
Is there somewhere youâve heard of that youâve always wanted to try? Let me be your drunk little guinea pig. Comment, DM, or email me and let me know where to go!
Chin chin!
xJG
Jenny Gorelick is a comedian and writer. She's been called an âever-charming hostâ and "crushworthy comedian" by Time Out New York. Her essays have been featured in the New York Timesâ Modern Love column, Cosmopolitan, McSweeneyâs, and the New Yorker Shouts & Murmurs. She never says no to a tequila shot. Keep up with her stand up and tasteful thirst traps here.